If you are reading this, the chances are that your relationship has reached a real low point or something of a crisis. Maybe the passion has all but gone and you’re down to the dying embers, and any meaningful communication now appears a thing of the past. Perhaps an affair has come to light and emotions are running high, and locked into a downward spiral you are just repeating the same conversations and accusations over and over again, frustration levels are rising, but nothing is being resolved. If this describes your current situation but you don’t want your relationship to end, please don’t give up yet as through Couple Counselling – there is still hope.
No matter how bad things seem right now and despite what you may be thinking, if the desire and determination is there, although it won’t be easy, it is still possible for you to turn your relationship around.
Through Couple Counselling comes the opportunity in a relaxed and friendly environment, to take a constructive, honest and more objective look without apportioning blame, at how you have arrived at this point, and the framework for you to explore ways of guiding your relationship in the right direction.
Not knowing what their counsellor will be like and what to expect from the counselling process, some clients are understandably apprehensive when they attend their first session. So in order to try and redress this problem, provide some peace of mind and help the first session along, here are two things that your counsellor is not.
Firstly, a judge, called in to listen to all the evidence brought before them, allowing them to determine who is guilty of causing the relationship problems and pass sentence on them. Working with a blame culture doesn’t encourage open and honest dialogue and will only add to what is probably already a fairly negative environment.
Secondly, someone who will tell you exactly where and when you went wrong and provide you with all the answers as to how to put everything right. This may sound disappointing for some, but counselling is not about a counsellor enforcing their ideas into other people’s lives, as this simply won’t be helpful.
Your counsellor will be someone who is passionate about helping you, in as relaxed, friendly and professional atmosphere as possible, to work things through. Like you, they will be someone who has experienced difficulties in life; having made their own mistakes, and is therefore not looking to pass judgement on anyone.
Their role is one of a facilitator, whose skills lie in coming alongside you as you pass through a time of uncertainty and confusion, and through their impartiality, gives you both an equal opportunity to speak, be listened to and understood.
By asking constructive questions and perhaps leading you in directions you hadn’t thought about, their aim will be to help you move away from the downward spiral you may be experiencing, and provide you with a structure that will help you to explore your situation and gain new insights. This should then enable you to look at your situation from a fresh perspective, empowering you to work things through together with your partner, to determine and implement your own solutions for the future of your relationship, whatever they may be.